Posts Tagged ‘danger’

Another Attack…

Wednesday, October 8th, 2008

Wake up.

Beautiful weather.

Amazing colors.

Head to UConn.

Have a great time in class today.

Get ready to hang out with her.

She’s here now.

“Feelings” are out in the open now.

Prayed with her.

Conversed with her.

Time for work.

Start feeling nauseous.

(he)’s in Starbucks…

I begin to get snappy and distressed.

(he)’s telling me to pick a fight…

I ignore.

(he) reminds me to pick a fight.

“I want to get angry and fight with her.”

I believe the lie…

30 seconds later, I pick a fight.

Argument starts and accusations begin.

Begin saying a couple things and now she’s crying.

(he) smiles…

Fear and doubt enter our friendship.

Admitting our faults and concerns, (he) gets desperate and starts losing.

We talk through it, pushing (him) away from the conversation.

Light enters back into our conversation.

(he) has no right in us anymore.

Nausea overwhelms me.

Throwing up for a few minutes, (he)’s no longer in the store.

(he) has no right inside of me.

(he) is a disease not welcome around me anymore but He is my savior.

I trust Him to stand by me forever.

When We Give (him) Access

Wednesday, October 1st, 2008

I awake early, feeling somewhat refreshed. Rolling over, tangled in my sheets, I notice the time was 6:42am. Awesome – more time to sleep. Daylight creeps into my room, erasing the shadows of nighttime from my walls. I fall back asleep.

9:56am… I overslept and won’t be getting to class on time or rather at all. Climbing out of bed and opening my door, I am suddenly aware of an eerily cold and quiet apartment. Something is not right. My stomach growls. Apparently, I’m hungry and that is what is wrong in my apartment.

The smell of cinnamin fills the room as cinnamin rolls finish cooking. The oven beeps, signalling that breakfast is ready. Sitting on my couch with a plate of cinnamin rolls, I debate whether or not T.V. or scripture is a better morning wake-up routine. Scripture wins.

Opening my bible, I find Proverbs 29. 

A man who remains stiff-necked after many rebukes will suddenly be destroyed—without remedy.

Whoa… its going to be one of those quiet times with slaps in the face from God. Excellent… (more…)

Something Afoot

Friday, May 9th, 2008

Read here first to understand

———-

Right now God is cooking a vision up inside of me. I got so excited last night talking to a friend about what happened the other day (here and here) and how I want to help.

God showed me a broken man, a man that needs help from his brother in Christ, and I’ll be damned if I let him go through life unnoticed.

I nearly jumped out of my seat driving home. I’m very vision-oriented and all I could see was visions of Paul being helped, people loving him and inviting him into their community of friends. I can’t wait until (more…)